doctors

recently i was reminded that although i have suffered at the hands of the medical community, i should not expect everyone else to have a mistrust for doctors. that comment really pissed me off and i can't seem to let it go.

i do not have a blatant and general mistrust of doctors. doctors are full of knowledge about their specific field. if you are sick, i mean really sick with something that we cannot handle on our own, i would obviously take you to the doctor and use any medications that were needed to make you better. i have given you tylenol and advil when i knew you were in pain. i gave you a couple of days worth of an antibiotic when you were a couple months old. i was told by a doctor that you had the "beginnings of an ear infection". you already cried so much and were so miserable much of the time, i believed that neither of us would survive an ear infection. so i gave it to you. then a lovely friend suggested i read "no more amoxicillin". she gave me the gist of the book, and though i didn't read it until recently, i learned enough from her and from searches online and in my natural health books and through consulting with our naturopath, to know that you likely did not have an ear infection, that if you did it would heal itself, and that if it were an infection, it had a very small chance of becoming dangerous. very small chance. i learned that the use of antibiotics for an ear infection would only allow your body to heal temporarily and that it was best to let your body work. so i have never given you another antibiotic and i will not unless the research i do and the consultation with our naturopath deems it necessary. i was recently told (again) that you had very red ears. i gave you pain meds so you would not suffer, and did not fill the script. you got better. i am not bashing anyone who gives their kid meds or even anyone who trusts their doctor, nor do i think i am better or right because of the way i take care of you. but i do believe that we all have a responsibility to ourselves, to our children, and to our world to be knowledgable. i was told by a pediatrician when you were weeks old that i should nurse you only for ten minutes per side no often than every two hours. luckily i did not listen to her. luckily i had a midwife to whom i was turning for my nursing advice. had i listened, and many moms do in our culture because they have no other resources, i would not have succeeded in breastfeeding you. and yes, your brother died at the hands of the medical community. i am at fault for not being more well-informed. i trusted my OB. and i have heard over and over again from many many mothers that they, too, suffered in one way or another because they trusted their doctors. endless breastfeeding support meetings, endless grief support meetings, tons of reading and talking to people who are trained in the field of natural health have led me to believe that doctors are good for some things, but for the vast majority of things concering our health and wellness, it is best to stay away from them. they have their place, but i could go on and on about why OBs and even certified nurse midwives often do way more harm than good to a pregnant or laboring or nursing moms. we should not turn to pediatricians for advice on breastfeeding (unless he or she is an IBCLC), discipline, or sleep. they are not trained in these fields. they are trained in the field of medicine. an OB is a trained surgeon. many have never seen a baby birthed naturally. many have not even breastfed their own babies.

and yes, i know this is not my best writing, but you are napping and could wake at any moment. we are going up to see our fabulous friend and her new baby, who was born at home last wednesday. and has yet to see a pediatrician, a doctor of any kind, a nurse, or whatever. i am so looking forward to bringing a brother or sister for you into the world that way. some day. with no interventions. with no inaccurate advice to piss me off.

and yes, doctors do piss me off. the female body is meant to birth babies -- big ones, small ones, whatever. and breasts were made to nurse babies -- big babies, little babies, early babies, grown up babies and even babies who have baby siblings growing in their moms bellies. babies are not supposed to sleep through the night until they are ready. they should sleep near their loved ones. they are not supposed to eat solid foods at four months. they do not need rice cereal. our bodies were made to heal. our bodies are amazing. trust them.