09 May, 2011

how long are you gonna nurse him?

so the time has finally come. people everywhere want to know when i am going to stop nursing you. so far no strangers have commented to my face. i actually look forward to that day so i can let loose on someone i don't care about. but the question keeps coming. it's coming from curious friends. from family members who just don't seem to get it. still after 19 months. they don't get it.

nursing is so much more than just food. you nurse when you are hungry. yes. and thirsty. yes. but you also nurse when you just need a break. a break from people who love you very much but probably quite often overwhelm you. a break from playing. or just to come touch base with me to say 'hey mom. i'm busy sometimes. but you and i are still tight. no worries.' you nurse when you are tired. or hurt. and yes, maybe sometimes you even nurse when you are bored. hell. i eat all the time when i am bored. but i eat cookies. or chips. at least mommy milk is nutritious.

and yes. it is still nutritious. it is full of all kinds of vitamins and nutrients. stuff you aren't getting from your solids. the few solids you are interested in eating. so i never have to worry about you getting enough protein or carbs or anything. it's all in the milk. my milk changes with you and with your needs. it's pretty damn amazing that way.

so i will just make the answer short and simple for everyone. i will keep nursing my son until he and i are ready to stop. holy shit! does that mean i might be nursing a two year old? yes. for sure. i can promise everyone right now that you will not be done nursing by the time you are two. or a four year old? maybe. likely by then you would want to nurse only a few times a day. maybe just to get to sleep. but maybe not. maybe you will want to -- gasp -- nurse in public. and guess what -- if you want to or need to nurse in public that badly that i cannot convince you to wait, i am sure i will nurse you in public even as a four year old.

and let's clear this one up for those of you who have not read this response anywhere else. "once they are old enough to ask for it..." really? so when your baby is asking for his bottle by saying "baba" you are going to refuse because he is asking for it? or if your kid asks for broccoli your response will be "no honey, you are too old for broccoli because you are old enough to ask for it." this one just aggravates me to no end. only in america do we have to defend our choice to use our boobs for what they are there for.

i was thinking about this tonight while nursing you probably about five times at your cousin's baseball game. i can't remember ever seeing anyone nurse in public. maybe it's because people are so discreet when they do it. maybe it's because i wasn't looking for it. maybe people just don't do it. but regardless, i have nursed you everywhere as you have grown. the most awkward places have been at wrestling tournaments and on a boat with you in your big life vest. i am sure your dad could remember more, but i don't really care too much. i just nurse you because you want to nurse and because it's good for you. and for me. it's good for us.

but i wonder how many people at that game were offended by what we were doing. i never seem to get looks. i have never been approached or made to feel that i shouldn't be nursing you. maybe people are just good at hiding their disgust. or maybe the majority of people really don't care.

either way. ii'm gonna keep nursing you until we are done. because it's good for us. and it's normal. period.

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